6969 Uke tab by Ninja Sex Party

Dm
[Narrator:] Somewhere deep in the slow,

eternal dance of the heavens drifts a 

planet called simply "Earth"

And among the otherwise unremarkable population

of this planet are two incredible 

heroes, destined to save the future from itself

A Dm G C

( F A#sus2 C )x4
[Danny Sexbang:] Hey Ninja Brian,

I made a time machine spaceship.

You... wanna go on it?

[Ninja Brian:]...

[Dan:] Yeah, okay cool

Gm                   F
Soaring through the galaxy,
    C
the stars and sky align
    Gm                     F
The speed of light's for pussies;
            D#
we're going at the speed of Brian
Gm                   F
Flying towards the sexual peak
   C
of history and time

C# A# C F# F
[Dan:] Computer, set a sexy course

for the sexiest year. Uhn!

F A#sus2 C
Sixty-nine
F A#sus2 C
Sixty-nine
F A#sus2 C
(Sixty-nine) I've got my space suit
F A#sus2 C
(Sixty-nine) And ninety pounds of space lube

C#
Crossing through into a fuckin' wormhole

beyond the Milky Way
D#           C#
That shit's far

To a time of Earth so far into the future

where everyone gets laid
D#        C#
Twice as hard
D
We're noble knights of honor

on a fierce and sultry butt crusade
E        D
Here we are

A Dm     G   C         F     A#sus2   C
Open the bay doors and let's live the dream
         F       A#sus2 C
Give the world a double team
  F          A#sus2  C
I bet it's a billion person orgy
      F     A#sus2     C
in an ocean of whipped cream

Cm A# F A#
Wait, this place isn't sexy at all!

And this robot sign says human touch has been outlawed

Cm        A#                        Fm
I can't believe my eyes, but it's a world without sex
   A# Cm                 A#
Everyone here just wears full-length pants
          F
and loose fitting turtlenecks
        D#         F        Gm
Men and women wave to each other
A#m    D#
from a respectable distance
  D#        F          Gm     A#m      D#
Without the thrill of boning, what is life?
        D#           F          Gm       A#m    Gm
We must speak to the Council of Dick Elders tonight

D#
[Dan:] Excuse me, Dick Elders?
F
[Dick Elder:] What do you want?
       Gm                 D#         F
[Dan:] I know it's most unusual to come before you so
        Gm                   D#
But the planet Earth sucks balls
             F
now that no one's allowed to bone
      Gm                         D#
We've come from the past to introduce you to ass

                           F
[Dick Elder:] Wait! You're Ninja Sex Party!

You will ruin our plans!
Gm
Guards! Sound the alarms!

If people have sex,

they'll break a thousand-year spell

There'll be a revolution

and they'll think for themselves

We control this planet of unsatisfied wood

Why does being evil always feel so damn good?

       A    Dm   G   C     F     A#sus2  C
[Dan:] Fuck that bullshit, we'll make it right
    F         A#sus2 C
Get ready for a sexy fight
   F          A#sus2   C
My dick's the spark of hope
           F     A#sus2  C
and a revolution shall ignite 
   Gm
tonight
      F                 C
We're taking flight, we have to find a girl

              Gm
[Dick Elder:] Shoot the fucking lasers!

Shoot the fucking lasers at 'em!

       Gm                 F
[Dan:] Show her what it means to love,
    D#
and fix this broken world

              Gm
[Dick Elder:] All the fucking lasers!

All the fucking lasers at 'em!

         Gm                  F
[Dan:] A new sex king will rule;
                C
let the boner banners be unfurled

C# A# C F# F
[Dan:] Ninja Brian, look at that girl

with the sad eyes and the beautiful blonde hair.

I'm immediately in love!

F A#sus2 C
(Sixty-nine) She spent a life all alone
F A#sus2 C
(Sixty-nine) Wanna take her to the bone zone
F A#sus2 C
(Sixty-nine) Make her feel the pleasure
F A#sus2 C                    Cm
(Sixty-nine) On a lonely treasure

A# F

Cm        A#
I can't believe my eyes,
               F
but you're the girl of my dreams
             Cm               A#
Let's both tear all of our clothes off
         Fm
like two pants-hating wolverines
    Cm                  A#
The love we make will save the Earth
           F
from this oppressive dick regime

D# F Gm

A#m
We're having sex now

D# F Gm

n.c
To change the world

D# F Gm

A#m
You brought your friends now

D# F Gm

n.c
Oh shit, they're girls!

Cm           A#
I think it's obvious
            F
that people liked our sexy show
          Cm            A#
A multi-billion person orgy
            Fm
has broken out all across the globe
    Cm               A#
The human race, much like my junk,
     F
will now be free to grow (let's go!)

D# F Gm

A#m
But what about the Elders?

D# F Gm

n.c
We tore their world to shreds

D# F Gm

   A#m
Maybe they'll be cool with it

D# F Gm
[Dan:] Oh hey, Dick Elders! How's it goin'?

                                  Gm
[Dick Elder:] You two are fucking dead!

          D#                  F
[Dan:] So much for that, it's time to put on pants
         Gm                    D#
And run away from their Death Army
         F
which is starting to advance

              Gm
[Dick Elder:] Shoot the fuckin' lasers!

Way more fuckin' lasers at 'em!

       Gm                  D#
[Dan:] We can't die, we're way too young
              F
And there are so many girls to bone

              Gm
[Dick Elder:] Shoot the fuckin' lasers!

Way more fuckin' lasers at 'em!

       Gm              D#
[Dan:] But now we're cornered
         F
with our backs against the wall!

              Gm
[Dick Elder:] It's all over, Danny Sexbang!

Your time has come!

But first, we're gonna take care

of your ninja friend, here!

[/Slash/]

[Dick Elder:] Aaaaaaarghhhhh!

       A  Dm    G  C   F   A#sus2      C
[Dan:] Goddamn, Brian, you killed them all
        F   A#sus2  C
Now the empire will fall
  F       A#sus2 C
I have to say in retrospect
         F      A#sus2 C
that was easier than I thought! 
     Gm
oh yeah!

    F                     C
Our work here's done, the future is secure
       Gm              F
But my girl and I have one last farewell
D#
slam just to be sure
    Gm               F
For underneath those rockin' boobs
       C
lies a heart that is so pure

C# A# C F# F
[Dan:] Take care of this world for me, my darling,

I will always love you

... What is your name by the way?
( F A#sus2 C )x4
Kristen? Ah, a beautiful name.

Until that glorious day when we meet again,

Katie, farewell!

         F A#sus2 C       F A#sus2 C
Now let us fly into the night sky
            F     A#sus2   C                 F A#sus2 C
And we'll raise a glass to ass in a final goodbye
          F A#sus2 C F A#sus2 C
To sixty-nine sixty-nine
       F A#sus2 C F A#sus2 C
Sixty-nine sixty-nine
        F A#sus2 C
(Sixty-nine)

Let us be gone
        F A#sus2 C
(Sixty-nine)

Our quest is life-long
        F A#sus2 C
(Sixty-nine)

It's a sexy destiny
        F A#sus2 C                          
(Sixty-nine)

so let's rock the fuck on
       F A#sus2 C  F A#sus2 C
Sixty-nine, sixty-nine

( F A#sus2 C )x2

G

     F
Fuck yeah

G

     F
Fuck yeah