The Squip Song Tabulatur von Joe Iconis

F G Bb F

F
freshman year
F
i didn't have a girlfriend or a clue
F
i was a loser just like you
F                Bb    Ab
good times would only soar by
F
i was gross
F
as every female would attest
F
my sexting was a futile quest
F
my little penis~ was depressed
F         Bb
he was so lonely...
Bb    F
poor guy.

      G
i was hopeless, hopeless
G
i was helpless, helpless
      Bb
every time i'd walk the hallway
        Ab
i would trip

Bb
i was
C
stagnant and idle
C
i was
Dm
so suicidal
C
and then
C
then, then (x5)
      F
then, then i got a Squip

F G Ab Bb

Bb         F
it's from Japan
F      G
it's a gray, oblong pill
Db                      Bb
quantum nano-technology CPU
    F                                 G
the quantum computer in the pill will travel through your blood until
Db              Ab                                 Bb
it implants in your brain and it tells you what to do

[spoken] "it's better than drugs, Jeremy~"

Bb         F
it's from JAPAAAAAAN!
F      G
it's a gray, oblong pill
Db                      Bb
quantum nano-technology CPU
    F                                 G
the quantum computer in the pill will travel through your blood until
Db              Ab                                 Bb
it implants in your brain and it tells you what to do

A#
it tells you what to do
A#    C
It's preprogrammed
C
it's amazing
Bb             Eb 
speaks to you directly
Bb
you behave as
C
it's appraising
Db                     Eb
helps you act correctly
F            G
helps you to be cool
Bb        Db   F
it helps you rule

F
picture this
F
nobody cares if you are late
F
cause even teachers think you're great
F                                              Bb
your weekend's just a full on slate of blowout benders
               F
of teenage rockstar splendor
F
right now you're
G
helpless, helpless
G
you are
G
almost hopeless
G       Bb
on the school's social map- you're just a blip
C
but if you           
take my advice and if you 
Dm
pay the listed price
               G
well, then you go from sad to interesting
   Bb
to hip, 
your whole life will flip
C              F
when you buy a Squip!

F Dm Db

F Gb Ab F